Feliz Navidad

Well, after what seems much longer than 10 days, we are back “home” in Taipei. We ended the semester well with a faculty Christmas party (about which I am seriously considering contacting the producers of The Office), a student Christmas party, and my first full marathon. I gave my legs about a 24-hour respite, we filled our bellies with a well-deserved American-style breakfast, and then we ventured out to the airport to for our long journey back to the States.

After passing through customs at LAX, we miraculously found my brother and sister-in-law, Harrison and Ali, within minutes. They took us to a diner for some equally miraculous American food. It felt so good to be able to read the menu, make an educated dining decision, and effectively communicate that decision to the waitress. We paid the bill with a not-so-missed American price tag and headed to their apartment. The next day was filled with fabulous food and delicious wine as Ali gave us a tour of everything Santa Barbara has to offer.

On Christmas Eve, the four of us climbed out of bed at O’dark:30 and groggily made our way back to LAX. We really appreciated that Harrison didn’t mention that he was hallucinating due to lack of sleep until we were safely inside the terminal. We hopped on a plane and four hours later, we were in sunny Mexico! We wished the customs agent a feliz Navidad and were off to our resort. As another Christmas miracle, we easily reunited with my parents and sister, Tori, who arrived just after we did on a different flight from Denver. We caught up over toddies and dinner and went to bed to await Santa Claus.


As I’m sure most people did on Christmas morning, we woke up, had a mimosa and staked out our beach chairs. Santa did indeed come in the form of lunch sack stockings that my beautiful mother toted all the way from Denver. The rest of the day was filled with such important decisions as, “Should I lay on my stomach or my back?”, “Should I take a dip in the ocean, or the pool?”, and most importantly “What should I order to sip on this time?”

The 26th was welcomed mostly by my sister whose boyfriend, Matt, was scheduled to arrive that evening. We decided to set up camp at the pool and joined in such exciting activities as water polo and water aerobics. The next several days mimicked the first as we discovered the best places to eat, our favorite waitresses, and how to reserve the hotel’s mini sailboats. Our evenings were spent with difficult dinner decisions and riotously entertaining games of Balderdash and Apples to Apples.

To mix things up a little, we all took an excursion on the 28th that led us swinging on zip-lines through the Mexican jungle. We then hopped on bikes and rode to a cenote, a fresh water-filled sink hole for a refreshing dip. The expedition concluded with dinner and the opportunity to buy pictures and videos of our Mexican jaunt. The next morning, Harrison and Ali roused themselves extra early to go scuba diving as the rest of us slept in to catch our 10:00 snorkeling tour. Wildlife highlights included a barracuda, a small stingray, and tons of coral. After these two exhausting days, we were ready for a break. So, we spent the next couple of days recuperating on the beach.

Much too soon, our vacation came to an end. We had a quick, tearful goodbye as we went our separate ways on New Year’s Eve. Chris and my flight to Taiwan didn’t leave until the 1st so Harrison and Ali joined us for one last party to ring in the new year in our hotel room in L.A. It finally came time for us to head back “home” so we boarded our plane. Four movies, two meals, and 14 hours of flying later, we find ourselves trying to adjust back to Taipei’s time zone and our life in Asia.

Great Clips, Eat Your Heart Out

There were a couple of reasons why I had been putting off getting a haircut while Chris and I have been here. First of all, choosing a salon and figuring out how to make an appointment was a little intimidating. Secondly, I wasn’t quite sure what I would do once I made it into the beautician's chair and attempted to communicate just what I needed done. Yesterday, the first half of the battle was conquered when my friend Rachel made the offer of taking me to her “regular” place and making our appointments. So, I decided to buck up and take on the second half of the battle.

We arrived at the salon at the pre-designated 3:00. While Rachel’s Mandarin is infinitely better than mine, we weren’t sure if we had two appointments at 3:00 or if we had two appointments with the same girl starting at 3:00, one after the other. So, I came armed with a book and my ipod just in case. When we climbed the two flights of stairs, we were received by a receptionist who wasn’t quite sure who to expect either. However, without skipping a beat, we both were whisked away by two assistant stylists into our separate chairs and our things were taken with a respectful bow and placed into a locker to which we were given the key. I knew that I was in for a special experience when the assistant then brought out two piping hot cups of oolong tea. It was at this point that the assistants and the receptionist got together and were trying to figure out why, exactly, we both were there. One of them finally got up enough courage and came to us both and asked nervously, “Cut?” We smiled and said that yes, we were indeed both there to get a hair cut.

As I settled into my chair, sipped my tea and flipped through a magazine that I had been given to select a hairstyle, the assistant came up behind me equipped with a warm towel and a slightly fragrant lotion. She then proceeded to rub, knead, push, press and squeeze my shoulders, back and scalp through a 20 minute massage. After this, I was led to the sinks where a different hair-washing assistant awaited. Placing my head on a small head rest in the sink (why don’t hair washing sinks have head rests in the States?), she delicately pressed a paper covering on my forehead as to avoid any unpleasant splashing on my face. After about 15 minutes of hair washing / scalp massaging, I hazily made it back to the styling chair.

It was at this point that I finally met our stylist. She slipped on my smock and I noticed that it actually had arm holes! I’m not sure if everyone has these now, but it was new to me and I was excited. Unsurely, I used my arm holes to charade my way through telling her what I wanted, half-way knowing that it wasn’t going to go exactly the way I planned but too relaxed to care. She snipped and combed and chatted with the other women in the shop as she toiled away with my hair. Just when I thought she was finished, I was taken back to the sinks for one more washing to ensure no snipped stragglers were waiting in my hair to cause back-itchiness later.

A few last minute trims and I was ready to be styled and sent on my way. I was given my bill, and I have to say, it was a little pricey at $520. Sorry, I meant NT$520 which actually works out to be about $18 U.S. Two hours after we arrived, we left the salon in a euphoric daze as I pondered the poor Taiwanese immigrant who is rudely welcomed into American culture by a sorely unsatisfactory trip to Great Clips. So, when it comes to the treatment of hair, I must say, “Well done, Taiwan. Well done.”

A Trip to the Grocery Store

I have to admit, I don't actually make it to the grocery store very often here in Taipei. This is for a couple of reasons. First of all, it is actually cheaper to go out than to go to the store and buy your own ingredients to make dinner. Living in an apartment neither equipped with an oven nor a dishwasher, I tend to lean toward this more economical option. Secondly, I often find myself wondering not only how to prepare the food I've purchased, but also what, exactly, the food is. However, I needed a few things today so I thought I would document my journey so that you can see what the aisles of an Asian grocery store are like through the eyes of an American.

A great big stack of rice

The soy sauce selection

Seaweed wrapped crackers, there are lots of variants of this one.

Good cereal can be hard to find, but I always think that Loopy Crunch goes best with kiwi.

Almonds and guppies, just like peas and carrots.

Yes, that is asparagus juice.

Bamboo shoots... these are found in lots of dishes and are actually quite tasty.

Dragon Fruit

Sorry, I have no idea on this one.


This is what I see when I try to read directions on how to make a pre-prepared food...

Squid anyone?

Fish head

Dried fish of some kind, I think. Really, your guess is as good as mine.

Which laundry detergent would you choose?

Have the seaweed sushi flavored Lay's caught on in the States yet?

Bet you didn't expect to see sarsaparilla over here.

One thing you can always count on...

Rules of the Road

Over the last five months, we have learned a thing or two about survival on the streets of Taipei. Here are a few tips to help you be a bit more street-savvy should you find yourself visiting loved ones in Asia (hint, hint…)

1) Our first tip is a common one in crowded cities. When you bump into someone, as you inevitably will, have no reaction. People will actually look at you funny if you say, “Excuse me”… or maybe that is just my bad Chinese accent. In return, don’t expect any semblance of an apology if you are bumped into, side-swiped, toe-crunched or slide tackled.

2) Traffic lights are merely suggestions. Green means, “Go straight through, you can even close your eyes if you want!” Yellow means, “Go straight through… just faster.” Red means, “You can still make it! Ten points for the man on the bike and fifteen for the old lady with the umbrella!”

3) Scooters are kings of the road… and the sidewalk. Do not get in their way, no matter what. Apparently, no traffic law applies to anyone riding on a scooter. They are allowed to run lights, ride on sidewalks, ride between cars on the roads, and even go the wrong way down one-ways. Don’t forget that there is at least a three-person minimum for riding the scooter as well. It is preferable to have your three-month-old snuggled safely between dad driving and the family beagle balancing on the seat behind him.

4) Use crosswalks at your own risk (see points 1 - 3). A green man walking on the sign by no means gives pedestrians any promise of a secure passage across an intersection. My recommendation? Take tips from Frogger. Also, don’t be above hollering, whistling, or even banging a hood or two to suggest to motorists that they should stay away from you (ask Chris for more details on this one).

5) Watch your step. Though most dog owners pick up after their t-shirt-wearing canines when nature calls, there are still plenty of strays who do not share this pooper-scooping luxury. It is advisable to have a friend trail blaze ahead of you and call back with the fecal report for the morning as to avoid any “tricky” messes.

6) Take advantage of your ignorant foreigner status. If you see someone trying to get people to take a survey or tell you about the specials at their restaurant, make eye contact and smile. There is no way they are going to approach you about your opinion on their costumer service when all they have are Chinese evaluations. Plus, you may be the only person to smile at them all day.

7) Finally, a tip about what to do when you see a white person on the street. If you are Taiwanese, stare in shock and amazement at the size of the foreign person’s nose. How can they even fit anything else on their face? If you are white yourself and you see another white person, wave. Chances are you probably know them.

Hong Kong

How to describe the city of Hong Kong? All weekend I tried to think of a way to illustrate this remarkable place to those who have never been there. Here is the best that I could come up with. If you have ever been to New York City, think of Times Square. Got it? Now put it on steroids, lots and lots of steroids.

Chris and I flew in on Wednesday evening and, after navigating ourselves successfully to our hotel, decided to explore Hong Kong’s renowned nightlife. Stepping foot out of the lobby, the first thing that we both noticed were the lights. Rainbows of giant neon lights scream at pedestrians and motorists on the streets below. And, unlike most big cities I know, the lights are not limited to one part of town. New York has Times Square, Paris has the Champs-Elysées, and even Las Vegas has The Strip. But, in Hong Kong, every street and every business competes for attention like a high school cheerleading squad. To attract tourists even further, major businesses get together and every night at 8:00, they put on a light and laser show to the great delight of photo-happy westerners.

The second thing that struck us as we attempted to steer through the swarms on the streets was the people. No, it actually wasn’t the number of people we encountered, but instead it was the type of people. We saw more westerners over the last five days than the last five months combined. Chris and I started a new game called “Guess the Nationality” in which we debated on whether the person in question was European or American. By the end of the trip, we were able to play with a fairly high success rate, though there were some Bermuda-short clad limeys that took us by surprise.

Having been initiated into this new city on Wednesday, we got up on Thursday ready to see what we could see and, of course, taste what we could taste. Being Thanksgiving, we knew that we needed to have a really great lunch. So, we asked our hotel to recommend the best Chinese food around. Hong Kong is known for a specialty called “Dim Sum”. In a dim sum restaurant, you are handed a paper menu and a pencil and you simply mark off the items you would like. Each thing that you order comes with two to four appetizer-sized snacks so you get to order several different types of food. If you really like one, just ask for another order! The whole time we ate, Chris and I were trying to figure out why on earth Chinese restaurants in America don’t provide similar offerings. The food was so delicious, we ordered extra for a doggy bad for a snack for later. We figured it could be like our Thanksgiving leftovers.

Invigorated by our tasty lunch, we headed across the harbor in search of one of Hong Kong’s “must-see” attractions, the Ngong Ping Gondola. Suspended high in the air, the gondola provides spectacular views of the city and outlying islands as it conveys its riders to the top of the mountain where a giant statue of the great Buddha awaits. Aided by beautiful weather, the views were indeed breathtaking, but they actually weren’t the highlight of the afternoon. The highlight came as we were standing in line when a bright-eyed dread-locked hippie came rushing toward Chris spouting off some sort of crazy moon language. After a few awkward seconds, it dawned on Chris that he was wearing a shirt proudly displaying the word “Polska” across the front. Ah, this guy thinks we’re Polish. Hating to disappoint the excited traveler, we informed him that we were not, in fact, Polish nor did we speak any of the language. This did not deter our new friend, however, and he sidled right up to us and began to exchange traveling stories. As it turned out, this guy was actually hitch-hiking across the world. He recounted times of being caught by Russian police when his visa was expired and taking a job teaching kindergarten in Beijing after his passport was stolen. Very entertaining indeed.

Our big adventure on Friday came after an unintentional tour of the city while we searched for a bus to take us to Victoria Peak, a bit of a misnomer as it turns out that this “peak” is actually located in the saddle between two other peaks. Riding on the second floor of a double-decker bus was quite an adventure as it screamed around twists and turns where one false move could have sent us either plummeting to our deaths off a cliff on one side, or careening head-on into another bus full of tourists on the other. However, we did make it alive to the top where we snapped some pictures and enjoyed the scenery.

On our last day, we decided to explore different parts of the city. We wandered through different markets and along random streets to see where they took us. We found parks, fresh fruit markets, knock-off purse and watch markets, expensive designer boutiques, and restaurants from places we didn’t know existed. Making it back to our side of town just in time for the 8:00 light show and some ice cream, we headed back to the hotel and put this trip in the books.

Giving Thanks

As the Holidays approach and homesickness starts to creep in, we are constantly being reminded that we are not in Kansas anymore, Toto. Being in a subtropical climate, there have been no red and gold falling leaves, no frost on the ground when you wake up, heck, it has barely gotten below 60º! There have been, however, dogs and babies dressed as animals to shield them from the below 70º frigid temperatures (see panda-dog below).

We have seen no heart-warming commercials about the son in the army who surprises his folks by ringing the doorbell during the Thanksgiving meal with a pumpkin pie in hand. Twinkling lights don’t wink at you from front porch windows nor are your ears assailed with Elvis’ classic Christmas carol I’ll Have a Blue Christmas over and over and over and over again from every radio station on the FM dial. Santa and his eight tiny reindeer don’t wave at you from store windows boasting 20% off the new paraffin wax pedicure set, at the top of every woman’s wish list. We don’t even get the signs that say, “Remember, Jesus is the Reason for the Season”. In fact, the only holiday reminder that we have, other than the calendar, is that Starbucks has recently changed their cups to the red ones with snowflakes and has added the toffee nut latte to their menu.

On the one hand, the lack of a Christmas wonderland leaves us wistfully dreaming of a far away place across the Pacific where friends and family gather over cranberry sauce and can actually read the directions on the can on how to serve it. On the other hand, it is nice to be in a place where we get to tell students why we take one day every year to thank God for all that he has given us and it is actually new information for them. It is fun to explain our “crazy” tradition of eating turkey (which is remarkably hard to find here) and dressing until we collapse into a tryptophan-induced nap while watching the Detroit Lions lose once again.

As we get ready to jet off to Hong Kong tomorrow to celebrate Turkey Day with some dim sum just like Grandma used to make, we are thankful for our sweet friends and family back in the good ol’ USA.

The Island is alive... With the Sound of Music

When I say the word “karaoke” what comes to mind? For me, images of sketchy bars that boast a dimly-lit stage and television screens with psychedelic pictures behind song lyrics dance through my head like the infamous bouncing ball. The aroma of cigarette smoke and stale beer is almost overwhelming as tone-deaf singers mumble awkwardly through the verses so they can belt out the chorus of classic tunes such as Sweet Home Alabama, Any Man of Mine, or even It’s the End of the World as We Know it. However, as you may know, karaoke is extremely popular throughout Asia, for some reason. We knew that we would have to partake in this cultural experience at some point during our time here and last night was the lucky night.

Before we even arrived, I knew that I was in for a different experience than what I had in my mind’s eye. We were invited to go by some friends about a week and a half ago because, apparently, you need to make reservations that far in advance. When we strode up to the site described to us by our friends, I had to double check to make sure that we were in the right place. Walking up, it looked like the entrance to an elegant hotel. No sketchy bar here, folks. There was a grand foyer complete with chandeliers and leather sofas for those who had not made reservations and were now waiting for an indefinite amount of time for space to become available. Lucky us with our reservations, we were shown directly to the elevators and to the twelfth floor of the establishment where our private room awaited us. No stage up in front of complete strangers, no listening to Mr. Three-sheets-to-the-wind sing I Will Always Love You for the fifth time (unless he actually came with you). Evidently, this is how it is always done here. Everyone gets a private room with a table, two microphones, and a television. Now, I am getting why this is more popular here.

Shortly after we were seated, our waiter came in to take our order. Orders successfully placed with the aid of our Taiwanese friends, we dove into the singing. We were very pleasantly surprised at the number of English songs they had in their selection. Though the lyrics sometimes were a little off (I am dig in you = I am digging you), we were happy to not have to try to read Chinese characters. Probably our favorite part, however, was the videos that they showed behind the lyrics while we sang. For a select few of the songs, they had the actual music videos. However, for the vast majority of the songs, they had random girls walking through parks or what I could only guess were tourism videos from Ottawa, Canada. Beat It! actually had a girl dancing around a no parking sign the entire time. Succumbing to temptation, Chris and I broke down and actually sang Sweet Home Alabama. But, the best part about it was that throughout the song, images proudly displaying the Australian flag were plastered on the screen. Hey, they both start with an A and speak a strange variant of English, right?

All in all, the evening was dubbed a roaring success and much good, clean fun was had by all. I encourage you all to set up a karaoke machine in your living rooms and turn on the BBC to duplicate the experience. Happy singing!