A Whole New Ballgame

Some of you may or may not be aware that I have taken on a new role here at GCA. Being a small school, we are obliged to take on tasks for which we may or may not be qualified. My new responsibility falls into the latter category.

Chris and I often joke about our many differences: morning person vs. night person, introvert vs. extrovert, rap music vs. country music, caring about Auburn football vs. not caring about Auburn football, etc. However, none of these differences is as pronounced as the disparity in our athletic abilities. Though I am tall and look like I should be good at sports such as basketball or volleyball, I am not. Actually, to say that I am “not good” at athletic activities is a gross understatement. The truth is, as soon as I see any sort of ball, all brain activity ceases and my sole concern becomes how I can avoid coming into contact with said ball. This actually made me a successful dodge ball player in elementary school, until I was the only one left on my team and everyone was depending on me to get other players out or catch a ball to get another team member back in the game. Then I wasn't so hot. My equipment aversion did not prove helpful in any other sporting event.

I give you all of this background information to help you fully appreciate the news that I am about to divulge to you. I have been asked to coach a sport. Yes, my friends, I am not simply on a sports team, I am in charge of teaching and training for it. For so many reasons, I never thought that this day would come, but here I am. Before you worry too much about the health and safety of the kids on the team, rest assured that I will not be handling any bats, balls, clubs or rackets. I am the new cross country coach of GCA. I am teaching kids how to run until their legs fall off. Fun, eh? I am actually pretty excited to try my hand at this because, though I know how to run myself, teaching high schoolers how to run is a whole different ballgame. This is true especially because this is the first time our school has had a cross country team. My first order of business was to train the kids to look forward to our “meet” instead of our “game”. I also had to convince the girls interested in the team (and their mothers) that their legs would not become fat from running. Go figure.

So far, coaching has gone well. The paramedics have not yet been called nor have I made anyone cry… yet. In my book, an ambulance-free practice is a successful one. Here’s hopin’ for four more weeks of successful practices!